The cyst that wasn’t a cyst, my little Voldemort, Voldemort the Baldy, saved my life. So did my irritation with him and desire to stop acting the part of Professor Quarrel, just like my vanity in wanting a tummy tuck and breast augmentation ultimately led to discovering that I had cancer in the first place. … More Voldemort, Who Saved My Life
Hello again, party people! It’s been a while. I let myself get busy living, trying to lose myself in the minutiae of my little life. I did. It was boring and exciting, like always. But, man! Has there ever been some stuff going on! First, like so many others, I was devastated by Hurricane Irma. … More Like I Need A Hole In My Head
Do you remember the last time you had to wait for something? I don’t mean like the service is bad at your favorite bistro and you revise your Yelp! to 3 stars from 5 or when you’re stuck in traffic and have to pee. Those both kind of suck in their own way, don’t get … More Are You Dense?
Actually, question all you like. There are some things that we all sort of universally want to know about living with cancer. It’s a collective nightmare scenario, really. So I asked friends on Facebook if anyone had anything specific they wanted to know. One set of questions (hey, Jon!) centers around whether there are foods … More Don’t Question Mah Authoritay!
So, here’s the thing. Makeup is MAGIC. I know I’ve said it before, but it’s the damn truth. Magic, y’all. I’ve always loved makeup, even as a little girl. I paid extra attention to all of the Seventeen articles, tried all the Cover Girl, Maybellene, and Clinique trends, and in eighth grade was certain that I … More But You Don’t Look Sick
One of my favorite Christmas songs is Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses. Aside from the bass line and overall catchiness, the song is about missed connections and how sometimes things that you thought were going awry were really something amazing waiting to happen. It’s about the good and bad and in between. Thanksgiving was hard … More Christmas Wrapping
I feel like I have the world’s worst hangover. Two days after treatment I felt like the first day of Influenza A (which I had 4 years ago, still a fresh nightmare), but otherwise it feels like varying degrees of hangover. Now, I know hangovers. That sounds like a brag, but you know what I … More The World’s Longest Hangover
I haven’t been posting. Not here, not on Facebook. Not on Twitter. Not my own words or thoughts, really. There’s so much happening that sometimes I can’t sort through it properly. I feel a certain impetus to put a positive spin on things, but I’m much more realistic than that. It often comes across as … More Face Value
Oh, yeah! I bought 2 bras! 2! Real bras, not sports bras or post surgical bras, no ma’am! From Soma, my favorite lingerie store, no less. I tried on a few different styles, and it turned out that the only things that felt right were the mastectomy bras. Hm. Huh. Between the concave area and how tender … More Is That A Maxi Pad On Your Chest, Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?
So, Right is down by half. At least the tip is down by half. Ok, so maybe it’s closer to two-thirds, but who’s measuring? On one hand, it’s awesome to still have any of my real nipple left, don’t get me wrong, but it’s still weird to know that I watched this bit of flesh … More The Tip Of The Iceberg